I Am A Traditionalist - Wrapping Up 2012

Well, Christmas 2012 is past.  I found myself resisting entering the season...feeling a bit like a small child who digs her feet in when her parent is trying to gently pull her toward something she is dreading.  How would we experience the first Christmas without my mother's presence?  Fortunately, when you have traditions, it is easier.  I just put myself in the right place at the right time and let go... allowing the momentum of memory and habit guide me.  Everything went smoothly and we did it!

Christmas Eve was held at my mother's home where those family members who could, gathered for a traditional meal and exchange of gifts. It was not exactly the same as in past years.  The house was set up a little differently, with small intimate eating spaces for 4 to 6 people rather than one long center table;

Mike, Milli and Gabriel with Uncle Chuck

 tamales and enchiladas added to the buffet spread alongside the pasta and antipasto.  The new presence of Blanca, my sister, Cathy's, caregiver and housemate, and her mother and daughter, expanded  our family mix.  After the gift exchange, we took turns selecting one of my mother's awards or mementos as a keepsake.

Fred selecting Mom's Habitate for Humanity Appreciation Plaque

In all, it was a very pleasant evening, a few tears, lots of laughter and the comfort of being together.

Christmas Day was quiet until my immediate family arrived for our traditional evening meal. Jay helped me prepare for the Family dinner.

Joe and Nik drove in from the hinterlands.

Mike, Milli and Gabe were there.  It was not exactly the same as in past year as we had the addition of Marc's fiancée, Charlotte.

 After eating and opening gifts, we reflected on the past year.  We watched the narrated photo DVD I create for Gabriel each year.

Gabe with his 2012 DVD

 We mentioned the lows we experienced...the deaths, the job losses, the health challenges.  And we mentioned the highs we enjoyed...the new relationships, the new life opportunities, the fun times.  We reveled in the fact that through it all, we hung together as a family.  We were there for each other.  We ended the evening resurrecting one more tradition, the writing of our "Hopes and Dreams" for the coming year.  We each had a sealed envelope of past years' lists and a blank sheet of paper to write items for next year.  After reflecting on the "old" lists, we faced the prospect of the new year knowing it is a blank slate.

We anticipate some happy events: a wedding, a new business, a growing new career, a new school, a new neighborhood, a trip to new places and we know that there are other unanticipated events also waiting for us in the future.  But at the end of the evening, I felt fine.  Actually, I felt more than fine...I felt full and confident.  Full of the gratitude for all that my life holds and confident of my ability to navigate whatever lies ahead.  So I bid a farewell to 2012 and face forward into 2013.